Hipsters have created a new style and everyone else is JEALOUS!! (Downtown)

Reply to: pers-549222856@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-01-23, 4:54PM EST


Take a look at the picture below... Do you recognize that character? That's right it's Velma from Scooby Doo, which first aired in 1969. Velma’s style of dress was pretty common for girls in the late 50's and 60's. This style derived from the Beat generation often referred to as the "Beatnik" scene. But hmmm- Doesn't it seem like you've seen Velma recently? Didn't you recently see Velma walking her Shiba Inu while sipping on a Soy Latte listening to a really bad indie rock band on her ipod nano? In fact haven't you seen thousands of Velma’s (and male Velma’s which can be difficult to distinguish) all around New York; infesting and destroying the heart soul and culture of any neighborhood they can latch on to?

Well my friend that wasn't Velma nor was it a Beatnik... It was a Hipster.

Message to Hipsters: All real New Yorkers hate you. Not just the jocks or the "frat boy types", ALL New Yorkers.

We hate your condescending bull shit about your style being cutting edge or original. That style is not original, (see Velma).

We hate your trash music and your unsettlingly lackluster art. How you honestly think that those unbelievably shitty indie bands don't sound worse then dry cat shit scraping against a brillo pad?

We hate how you consider your corny inside jokes to be "witty banter". It's not that your humor is above anyone intellectually it's simply that you are not funny! And the same goes for your dogmatic political views; who convinced you that you were more enlightened then the rest of us? Tell me something that I didn't learn in my junior high school sociology class.

We hate how you try to front that you’re not a trust fund baby by wearing shitty clothes and not showering. We all know you're rich bitch, so stop it; you're stinking up the train.

We hate how you are subtly racist and will not associate yourselves with the Black, Hispanic, or even the native White New York population because you're scared to death that we will rob and kill you (which we would if it were legal, and it should be). True you might see one black in a crowd of hipsters, usually an Uncle Tom type, ready and willing to accept his role as sidekick. And no, just because you occasionally listen to RUN DMC it does not mean your not a racist.

We hate you because you infest and SUCK the souls out of once great New York neighborhoods (R.I.P. L.E.S.). Neighborhoods that good, honest, working class folk broke their backs to make livable. In much the same way that the whites drove Native Americans from their lands you drive native New Yorkers from theirs. But it's not guns and disease you use, but your money. Money that you worked hard to acquire? No money you were born with; modern day primogeniture.

And finally we hate how you transplant fucks come here and after a few months swear that your a New Yorker. You're not... You never will be and New Yorkers will always be able to smell you a mile away (unless you change your ways and start to shower). But I'm not too worried. You hipsters can stick around until your ass bleeds from being fucked by landlords.

to the hipster cunt that complained about $30 cleaner