Crisis: Starbucks closes for 180 minutes.
Posted by diehipster at 2/26/2008 7:28 PM and is filed under uncategorized 
It's 8:00pm. The skinny manboy pulls the door handle of his Starbucks. It's locked. He sees the sign and almost drops his Mac on his Chuck Taylor. The sign says "Starbucks will be closed from 5:30pm - 8:30pm for espresso machine button pushing lessons". He feels cheated and betrayed as a loyal $4.00 a cup/8 hour a day customer. Not that $4.00 is a lot to him for a cup of bitter and burnt coffee. Mom and Dad can re-fill his Starbucks Card online all the way from Portland, Oregon. He can't believe that he will have to wait 30 more minutes to open his Mac, to have other New Yorkers like him stare at his asymmetrical bed-head hair-do, to sip his Vente Whatever, to remotely blog, to start meaningless conversations about topics he has forced himself to like in order to be accepted into hipsterdom. Yes 30 more mintues! It got worse. During all the chaos, he failed to notice a 3 block long line of mirror images of himself that had formed during the first 2 1/2 hours of the crisis. Stories like this were coming from all 158 New York Starbucks locations.
In today's New York Post, a girl was quoted saying "What am I supposed to do, make it myself?" , "I am shocked. Shocked and appalled." Are you shittin' me you spoiled rotten wanna-be? Coffee is like the easiest fucking thing on earth to find. You couldn't walk across the street and get it from another store?
Another girl was quoted saying "A lot of people come here to make out, read, sleep. I can't imagine how lost people will be tomorrow." Make out? Sleep? Somebody shoot me. How lost can you get without having access to a Starbucks for three hours?
Links:
New York Post
Huffington Post
The Ledger
Newsday
and finally.....The Starbucks Gossip Board where Starbucks employees and coffee connoisseur poseurs discuss everything from company politics to burnt milk.
In today's New York Post, a girl was quoted saying "What am I supposed to do, make it myself?" , "I am shocked. Shocked and appalled." Are you shittin' me you spoiled rotten wanna-be? Coffee is like the easiest fucking thing on earth to find. You couldn't walk across the street and get it from another store?
Another girl was quoted saying "A lot of people come here to make out, read, sleep. I can't imagine how lost people will be tomorrow." Make out? Sleep? Somebody shoot me. How lost can you get without having access to a Starbucks for three hours?
Links:
New York Post
Huffington Post
The Ledger
Newsday
and finally.....The Starbucks Gossip Board where Starbucks employees and coffee connoisseur poseurs discuss everything from company politics to burnt milk.
A message board to discuss coffee. What the fuck is this world coming to????????????????
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Just think of all the unwritten screenplays. Juno II, what could have been.
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$4 coffee at Starbucks? The only $4 coffees at Starbucks that Iv'e seen are the expensive blended drinks but then Dunkin Donuts is about $4 for blended drinks as well.
The dumpy bakery across the street has crappy coffee for $2 for a small which is a lot more than the $1.75 I pay for a small at Starbucks in NYC.
Get a clue!!
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Shut up Mike, nobody gives a shit about the dumpy bakeries coffee.
I realize thats what the article is about but sheesh.
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